Questionable Behavior From Adults 🙅🏾‍♀️

Today's topic is pretty straightforward with questions to ask yourself. I'll be using examples from what I've been dealing with recently.

Like how would you respond? Do you act this way as well? Are the consequences the same? And if so what are they? This topic is based on how I feel, I don't need y'all rioting about these responses it's not a big deal but I do feel we need to pay attention to our behavior and how people respond and react to it. As we get older do we hold more responsibility on how the world sees and reacts to us.This topic is going to be an example on adult behavior and how it affects me and others around me 

  

When I was younger I was told to watch what I say because there are consequences to my words, or my favorite "if you don't have a thing nice to say don't say it at all". So a lot of times I remained silent or stayed behind while bad things were happening or just never said the things that needed to be said, or when i did say anything it was too late or too crude. 

  I'm staying at a shelter right now I can't name it but it's ummm well it's a shelter let's say that, but It had great examples of what I'm talking about on communication and maturity. One being this girl we will call her mag short for magenta since we already have a red, as an African American woman from what is assumed to be Aurora I will say she speaks with honesty and with feelings LOTS  of feelings. One example that's also set me off mentally today that I'm giving to God is a bed situation, she moved from her area to right behind my head next to the smoking door and is being super rude to anyone and i mean anyone.

One crude example is" can you not stand over here by me" in defence to a walker bound woman waiting on a friend nowhere near her bed. Another is her walking around at 11:50 pm half singing half humming when lights off was at 10pm, or her saying to a wheelchair bound person " y'all not doing this in and in all night". My first thought was " no one told you to move by the smoking door" and  please stop being rude to people because you want to get your way", remember what I said readers about how I was raised and not being able to say anything, well I can't and won't be saying anything to her now all i can  think about is the way I'll be reporting this place to the mayor with evidence.

Now do I have pure intentions...no not right now which is why I'll be waiting taking evidence down and taking names. Anyway bunny trails back to my thoughts at hand do you believe her behavior was appropriate? What would you have said? Would you have reported it to staff? 

  Next is one let's call her flop she was supposed to be a friend but this person flopped. she had a verbal altercation about someone touching her wrap and spent 45 mind going off about " dirty people" and "bubble guts" just cussing and screaming mad, now I don't disagree with her on the dirty people because turns out lady had head lice 😲 it was the response to everyone after. Someone else got into an argument outside and because she was heated and the other girl was heated she went to egg her on to a fight and they weren't even mad at each other, it was so weird not to mention I was worried about the other person and accidentally locked eyes with her and soon shes coming at me  like someone who was possibly on drugs at the time. But long story short they both calmed down but that interaction was it necessary? 

  

  Okay okay I know you're wondering iris what about you? Yes I have one about me. On my second day here I had to deal with a woman we will call her tasmanian devil, we got into a verbal altercation because she was upset because someone was playing rain sounds and she couldn't sleep. Now I realize that's valid however her it was her response that sent me over the emotional edge, she decided that playing bongos by cardi b and Megan the stallion at 6:30 in the morning above my head. I was angry to say the least I was hoping to sleep till 7 at the most, my response was to say "you're acting like a child punishing everyone else for the actions of someone else". she didn't like that first she said no then the collective verbal diarrhea of " I don't give a f*** , which set me off saying "of course because you're a child with nothing else to say" and something else along the lines of f** you too buddy. 

what would you have done? some woman at the shelter helped to calm me down saying they ignore this stuff all the time and sleep is a gift around here, telling me I've had better luck talking to a wall because this place is filled with "special types of people". 

I can't and won't actually say the words they actually said but they all collectively said the same thing which was disturbing but not false, I have two more examples but let's turn in to the questions I asked earlier on in this blog. 

I one hundred percent would have changed what I said because there is no getting through to people who don't want to listen, so I have zero place saying anything to her since it was clear she didn't want to listen in the first place. Two she was kicked out for threatening staff and the other ones moved behind me and they are friends so I'm stuck in an uncomfortable position if they retaliate. As I've gotten older I have lost the spark for constantly going back and forth with people I find it more draining now than I did before. When we get older we waste more and more energy on people, places and things till we realize that, we can keep that energy for ourselves stop letting people have access to who we are and the things we do. I no longer want to speak with people who don't want to have an adult conversation, or who don't have the energy to give. Being conversationally left out in the cold isn't for me anymore I want more than cold friendship and bad conversations.

  One last one and then we will close out, recently flop from the confrontation who snapped at me had a verbal altercation just now with another resident let's call her Blondie for her super short blonde hair. I didn't catch much of the verbal altercation but something's where said along the line of killing murdering,  I'm going to be honest flop wouldn't say or do  that...maybe I honestly only knew her 3 days if not a week. It escalated into the computer lab so bad three staff had to come and they had to lock blondie in the computer lab, my anxiety revved up so bad because the laundry room is across from the computer lab and it was HEATED y'all. I was the one who went and got staff in the first place flop may be raged filled but she's still chill I believe and I don't really know who started it I worry I'm playing the devil's advocate with this one here.

We as women in a shelter are incredibly vulnerable to each other and the elements, there are multiple shelters but only 3 for single woman and two are packed and one of them is ours some have been residents here for years while some are still baby stays. Drama runs this facility you could put up billboards and it wouldn't be enough, some people are just angry and bitter that's what sad but remember you're not responsible for other peoples behavior or actions the best thing to do is keep to yourself and find what drives you forward.